Dear Friends and Family,
We are so grateful for the all of the encouraging words you have spoken to us over the last few months regarding my upcoming procedure. What a privilege it is to be a part of the body of Christ. We appreciate all your prayers and are eager to let you know that we have felt an enormous amount of peace in the midst of this trial.
I wanted to take the time to write to you all myself so that you might hear from me personally regarding this situation, so please bear with.
Probably one of the biggest struggles I have faced over the last few weeks in the midst of the upcoming procedure is not wanting to be a bad representative of the Lord. As you all know, Lucas and I believe wholeheartedly that God ALWAYS wants his people well. Christ died for us Spirit, Soul AND Body to redeem us from the curse. Because of Him, we are able to access things “on earth as it is in heaven” (see Matthew 6). The revelation of God’s goodness by grace through faith righteousness in Jesus Christ has been something He has been ministering to us for quite some time now. And I’m excited to say that this message of His love keeps getting better and better each and every day. For the first time in my whole life I can honestly say I know God loves me.
But what about people who are reading this and don’t know about His goodness—that God wants them well, too? If my procedure continues as scheduled, will people who have been praying for my healing become discouraged with God? This is the question I’ve been wrestling with, but praise God, He’s been delivering me from this condemnation.
One of the first things I needed to realize is that Satan is the “accuser of the brethren”, and no matter how hard I try to do right, say right, or believe right, he will always accuse me of not doing enough. The Lord revealed to me that I in my own strength cannot even believe hard enough to see the manifestation of what I’m believing for. He’s also been showing me that the faith He has given us, is not to be used to believe for things, rather to believe in the finished work of Jesus. What freedom I’ve experienced when the enemy comes to make me feel like I’m not doing enough to receive, to be able to look to Jesus as the one who paid the price, even when I couldn’t. So my focus in these tough times has simply been on Jesus and who I am in Him. I think also a lot about Romans 8:32–“He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?” You see Jesus did not just pay the bill and cover the cost, but because of His value and worth He overpaid the price of our sin.
The other ridiculous thing the enemy wants me to feel is stupid for getting my hopes up and being happy when other people ask me how I am doing. I was talking to Lucas the other day about how I have had a lot of people I’ve run across lately ask me how I’m feeling, and in my ignorance, I’ve said, “Fine,” rather matter-of-factly, thinking that they were inquiring of my physical state of being. (I’m not experiencing any symptoms that cause me to believe something is wrong with my heart.) I told him that it finally dawned on me that they were probably asking me how I was doing emotionally, in which case the answer would have been “Great!” But for lack of sounding like I’m looking forward to surgery, I simply smile and say, “Thanks.” In these situations I’m always reminded of what 1 Corinthians 1:18 says, “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.”
In short, I just want everyone to know that God is faithful to do what He has promised. “As the Scripture says, “Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame” (Romans 10:11). Thanks again everyone for believing with us and supporting us. I know everything will be fine and I’m looking forward to coming home soon. Love you all.
-Krissy
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